No more bedtime battles…I hope

We’re doing a little experiment over here.

Actually, it’s not so little. It was quite a huge undertaking over the weekend.

But you see, we’re a little desperate. Once again. For sleep. For our protected adult time that doesn’t entail falling asleep with our kids. Every.single.night.

Admittedly, we cuddle our kids to sleep every night. And, for the most part, we love it. We treasure those quiet moments. Reading books, sharing stories from our days, and reconnecting.

It would just be nice if the hubs and I could survive the whole routine and reconvene downstairs. In our protected adult world.

So…we took quite the leap of faith. A plunge. A daring maneuver. Call it what you will…

We moved Big Brother and Little Sister into the same room.

Maybe this isn’t such a radical idea, but when the hubs innocently mentioned this as a possibility, a flash of light went off. Yes! This is it…the end of our bedtime battles.

I hope.

Little Sister was ecstatic. As we moved her bed into Big Brother’s room, she was hopping and dancing around. She says it feels like we’re on vacation. Yes, a novelty for now.

Big Brother isn’t thrilled. In fact, he kind of sulked through it all.

But for heavens sake! He’s the one who needs a warm body nearby. He’s the one who’s constantly roaming the halls, waiting at the top of the stairs, or begging for one more book, one more more song, a snack…you get it.

He’s the one who needs this the most.

So we’re on day 2.

First night? Awesome. Hubs and I are downstairs by 8:30 pm which is fantastic in our books. Little Sister conked out fast. Big Brother stayed in bed reading until he fell asleep.

The fact that he stayed in his room?

A miracle I tell you.

And he (reluctantly) reported that he fell asleep much sooner because Little Sister was there.


Second night was good but I slipped back into my old habit. I fell asleep with Little Sister. The hubs survived and made it downstairs.

Kind of a success.

I’m still hopeful and chalking up last night to my exhaustion and not the because the kids were begging for anything.

So on we go with this room sharing adventure.

Being the unrelenting idealist that I am, I see this new arrangement as resulting in more time for us (the hubs and I) and more quality and bonding time for them (Big Brother and Little Sister)

Seriously, I imagine late night talks, whispers, giggles, and conspiracies among those two. What memories they will create. Imagine how much closer they’ll become.

The hubs and I are brilliant I tell you.

And, I know what you’re thinking…please don’t burst our ever hopeful bubble just yet.

The fights. The arguing and incessant teasing that’s bound to keep them up at night? No…not gonna happen. It can’t.

Our survival depends on it.

Wish us much luck.

Do your kids share a room? How’s it working out?

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17 Responses to No more bedtime battles…I hope
  1. Practical Parenting
    March 27, 2012 | 12:30 pm

    I hope this works! Sleep issues are so hard. My daughter is the one who struggles here…we have a very specific routine that we created together that helps her feel safe and less alone and it seems to work well…I’m relatively certain she would drive her brother nuts if they were together 😉

    • Melissa
      April 3, 2012 | 2:01 am

      Oh Katie, so far, SO good! As my husband said…I think we’ve discovered plutonium :)

  2. Efka
    March 27, 2012 | 12:32 pm

    Yes they share, we have only 2 bedrooms, so they kind of have to. Big brother and little sis. Working out great already for a year. Little sis is 2 and brother is almost 6.
    Little sis sometimes wonders at night to our bed to finish up her sleep.

    • Melissa
      April 3, 2012 | 2:02 am

      I’m so glad we did this. So far, it’s working out great :)

  3. Melinda
    March 27, 2012 | 1:48 pm

    We have three boys – one is an infant, so the two “big” boys share a room (7 and 4). The four year old has always been an excellent sleeper so that has not changed much. But, sometimes, the little one keeps the big one up for HOURS with giggling and joking. That can be annoying. But for the most part, I love it and they do too…the “big boys’ room”.

  4. angela
    March 27, 2012 | 3:21 pm

    I am interested to see how this works! I’ve thought about it with mine, but I think the little one (2 years) might be too young to really understand it. We’ll see…

    • Melissa
      April 3, 2012 | 2:03 am

      Angela, we can’t believe how wonderful it’s been so far. Ours are 4 and 7 so they’re at a good age for it. Seriously, the best thing we’ve done :)

  5. Shelly
    March 27, 2012 | 3:36 pm

    My son (5 years) and daughter (3 years) share a room and actually share a large bed too. It has really limited the amount of bedtime battles we have. My son is the one who tends to be afraid of the dark, etc., but having his sister there helps him with his fears. They do have great night-time giggles and talks, (sometimes too much!) but I will take those over constantly having them in and out of bed. We have a bedtime routine that includes drinks of water, stories, and cuddles so other than using the bathroom, they may not leave their room for other reasons once they have been tucked in. Generally this has worked really well for us! I am dreading the day that I have to move them to separate rooms and beds!

  6. Jadah
    March 27, 2012 | 5:42 pm

    Good luck on the experiment! It sounds like a sweet success so far. My husband and I have been working on a sleep experiment with our four year old daughter. We’ve been playing the silent game if she escapes from her bedroom. I’m working on sharing it on our site. Adult time is so minimal with kids and after bedtime is so important for our sanity to recharge and reconnect with ourselves.

  7. Meg
    March 27, 2012 | 5:56 pm

    Putting ours (girl, 2.5 and boy 4) in a room together has been awesome! Seriously — revolutionary change. It’s cut 45 minutes off bedtime and the big one completely stopped coming in our room at night, in addition to allowing for a completely easy transition for the little one out of the crib. But the really amazing part is that they now often wake up and play together for up to an hour in the mornings and we can stay in bed! I think they just needed the company :). Good Luck!

  8. DrMomto2
    March 27, 2012 | 6:21 pm

    Our 2yo girl and 5yo girl are now sharing a room and a full size bed – it is great!!! definitely made a co-sleeping transition *much* easier

  9. Kristin
    March 27, 2012 | 9:14 pm

    I wish we had a second child to move into a bedroom with our first!
    Our son is 8 mos old and this month bedtime has been a real challenge. Just tonight it took from 7:45 till 10:30 before he fell asleep. I have not idea how he stayed up that long, his last nap ended at 4:30pm. Crazy amount of cuddling, and stories, and rocking, and nursing.

  10. Susan
    March 28, 2012 | 2:30 am

    I tried it once with my 4 year old b/g twins. My son loved it, but my daughter hated sharing and refuses to try again. I’m sad b/c my son really needs the company.

  11. Meghan
    March 28, 2012 | 7:10 am

    Good luck! I’m ashamed to admit that I have fallen asleep every.single.night with my 4-year old since we moved him to a big boy bed a year and a half ago! It started because I was pregnant and exhausted, and the few minutes of snuggles turned into me passed out as soon as I was horizontal. Then I had a newborn and was exhausted, etc. Now the newborn is a 1-year old, sleeping through the night, and it still happens. I’ll keep this in mind when it’s time to move the little one!

  12. Jessica
    March 28, 2012 | 10:26 am

    I share a room with my sister (who’s 18 months younger than I am) for most of my life. I enjoyed it so much that I am anxious awaiting the day when I can move my two girls in together. Currently, my littlest one isn’t sleeping through the night, so that had been an issue. Oh, and, another issue was that my oldest (25 months old) had trouble staying in her room without someone with her at all times. The latter issue, I think, has been resolved, however, since my husband and I vowed yesterday to be firm with bedtimes and with her staying in her room and falling asleep on her own. So, yeah, we’re getting there!

    I think it’s great that you’re having your kids sleep together! I think room sharing is only a good thing!

  13. Yolanda
    April 2, 2012 | 10:00 am

    my kids (now 3 and 2 yrs old) have shared a room for the past year. it has its pros and cons, but we wanted to streamline the bedtime routine as well as encourage the concept of sharing space. the room is not big, so sometimes I’m tempted to just switch to separate rooms. they have also been getting sick of each other, especially at this young age when each are all up in each other’s business. as a result, i do have to make more effort to create personal space for them in other ways during play, snuggle time, etc. but all in all, i love watching them make the most of time spent together. even if they sometimes keep each other up. since they are brother and sister, there will soon come a time when they can’t share a room for the sake of privacy. the pros definitely outweight the cons in my book.
    good luck! i hope there are many wonderful memories made between big bro and little sis. and many nights of adult time together to come!

    • Yolanda
      April 2, 2012 | 2:37 pm

      Melissa, there’s a post i wrote to remember a special memory of the kids sharing a room. whenever i have one of those nights when i wonder if i should just separate them, i go back to this post and remember why i value my kids sharing a room.
      hang in there and hugs!

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