Dear Little Sister,
You are having a rough day. I can see (and hear) that.
I wish I knew how to ease your frustration, how to stop those overflowing tears…but sometimes, I’m at a loss.
The perfect, patient mommy in me wants to stop…
….stop making dinner.
….stop driving you to school.
….stop getting ready for work.
….stop packing lunches…and just sit with you as you work it out.
However, I’m far from perfect and my patience often eludes me just when I need it the most.
It’s at these times that I really want to say in the most gentle, honest, and loving way possible…honey, I really don’t have time for your meltdown right now.
But I don’t.
Because I know you are in the throes of overwhelming emotion when it happens.
And I get it. Sometimes a cathartic cry is good for the soul. Yours. Clearly not mine.
I try my best to remember that at these moments it’s you in distress. Not me.
I want to muster all the patience in the world to just stop, listen, and be there for you.
To hear you, see you, and connect with you.
But then my left brain takes over and I realize it makes no sense to me at all.
Why putting on your shoes would trigger an all out meltdown. Right there in the school parking lot.
I push past the logic and gently wipe away your tears. I hug you and scoop you up in my arms. Shoeless.
I carry your delicate four year old body all the way to meet Big Brother at his class. And yes, I’m breaking a sweat, but I hold you.
We are heart to heart in that backbreaking moment.
You lay your head on my shoulder and it’s then that I realize…all you needed was for me to slow down and just hold you.
Ahhh….the crazy joy of parenting…how do you manage to keep it together when your child is in the throes of a meltdown?